Phone conversation with a Girl

The goal in mind while talking to a girl on the phone for the first time should be to decide clearly on whether you want to continue the proposal to the next level i.e. meeting personally. If there is no clarity on the goal then you will not be able to have a focused conversation.

Usually it is the Guy’s responsibility to schedule the call in advance may be a day before. Hence you can send an SMS informing the time for the call or your parents can set the call. Be well prepared before the call. Select a nice & comfortable place to sit. It may be a couch in your bedroom or a nice cozy corner of your house where no one can disturb you.  Avoid open and public places as there will be a lot of disturbance and noise. It would be good if you are alone for the call as this will help you to focus on the call. It will be better to use hands free on your mobile so that you can move around freely while talking. Also ensure that your mobile has maximum network coverage & the voice is clear.

The most difficult thing is to start the conversation. It is good to start by asking her if she is comfortable to start the conversation. This will give a good impression on your politeness & caring attitude. Then you can give a reference, for eg; “after the conversation among our family members, I thought it would be great if we talk first & then meet personally” Or you can mention the source from where you got her contact details & then start. Be simple & genuine in your conversation. Don’t show any attitude as you maybe misunderstood as arrogant. Speak in the language which is most comfortable to both of you.

If she is working then you can move on to questions about her work profile, office timings, etc. or you can start with general discussions on hobbies, things you have in common, etc. Keeping the attributes of the girl you want,  slowly start moving to questions on expectations & some sensitive questions which are very important for you to discuss in the first conversation. The intention of this call should be to judge her basic nature & compatibility. For your ease you can make a basic list of your questions; for eg: your list can contain questions on her family, cooking, hobbies, other activities, areas of interest, favourite pastime, etc. The more sensitive discussions & other details can be sorted if you both decide to move ahead to the next step i.e. meeting personally. Also you need to be prepared to answer her questions on your career goals, future plans, financial security, etc.

You can add a little humor in your conversation but never use vulgar, rude or offensive language. Be careful not to offend her relatives or parents. Do not start an argument if you disagree with her on any particular topic or opinion. Be polite, open & truthful in your conversation as false statements can land you in big time trouble later on. It is better to be clear from the first meeting or else the girl may lose her trust in you & later on it may be difficult to pursue the proposal.

It is better to limit the first call to a maximum of 60 mins; you can have a next call later. Try to conclude with some concrete next step, for eg:  “you discuss with your family and I’ll discuss with my family & then we can decide the way forward” or you can decide the next call timing.  Never commit anything on your first call as speaking to her on phone and meeting her personally might be a different experience.

You will always cherish the moments of this first call; so enjoy & a happy soul mate searching…..

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